this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
How does it feel to date your dad?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
