My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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