This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
