I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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