the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I'm really busy with my period
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize