he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize