and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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