you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
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A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
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I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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