this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
