What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
19 People Did The Wildest Things When They Were Black-Out Drunk
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
21 Signs That A Dude is Probably Insane
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.