The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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