Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

You look like a girl that would like strip clubs

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(732): You look like a girl that would like strip clubs http://tfl.nu/jf13

Replies (17) Good night (2772) Bad night (890)
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(979): View more from Texas

Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.

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(979): Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina. http://tfl.nu/ikem

Replies (26) Good night (960) Bad night (3867)
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(815): View more from Illinois

You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!

(847): View more from Illinois

Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!

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(815): You left a skid on my bar stool!!!! (847): Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool! http://tfl.nu/5bzd

Replies (24) Good night (1147) Bad night (5216)
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(706): View more from Georgia

Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?

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(706): Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession? http://tfl.nu/ohzs

Replies (50) Good night (6383) Bad night (2094)
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(845): View more from New York

i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out

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(845): i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out http://tfl.nu/p8nx

Replies (3) Good night (3061) Bad night (854)
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(815): View more from Illinois

I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.

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(815): I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis. http://tfl.nu/m4yy

Replies (6) Good night (1107) Bad night (3051)
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(510): View more from California

I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.

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(510): I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life. http://tfl.nu/v2uu

Replies (5) Good night (1223) Bad night (2774)
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(504): View more from Louisiana

Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.

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(504): Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit. http://tfl.nu/1p19

Replies (4) Good night (2618) Bad night (877)
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(803): View more from South Carolina

and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace

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(803): and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace http://tfl.nu/njta

Replies (8) Good night (2822) Bad night (806)
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(330): View more from Ohio

After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.

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(330): After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator. http://tfl.nu/loee

Replies (5) Good night (1755) Bad night (705)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me

(1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question

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(570): I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me (1-570): How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question http://tfl.nu/l5jk

Replies (11) Good night (1003) Bad night (1716)
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(774): View more from Massachusetts

omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....

(774): View more from Massachusetts

HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance

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(774): omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore.... (774): HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance http://tfl.nu/0qjd

Replies (4) Good night (1972) Bad night (757)
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(541): View more from Oregon

I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.

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(541): I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea. http://tfl.nu/3k5t

Replies (11) Good night (1223) Bad night (830)
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".

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(920): We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started". http://tfl.nu/xqcg

Replies (0) Good night (633) Bad night (380)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?

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(336): Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid? http://tfl.nu/9dj6

Replies (3) Good night (477) Bad night (237)

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