this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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