so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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