look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
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