The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
zippers are such a cool invention
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
