we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
