Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
