I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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