are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
