hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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