If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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