So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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