I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
