absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
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