Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
