They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
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Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
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I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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