there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
