i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
