i don't like sucking hair
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
