I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
