did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Randomize
