This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
