I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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