Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
