dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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