How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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