At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Randomize
