Texts From Last Night

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  (765): View more from Indiana

  Why are you ignoring all of my texts?

  (1-765): View more from Indiana

  The power was out.

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  (765): Why are you ignoring all of my texts? (1-765): The power was out. http://tfl.nu/9x7x
  Replies (17) Good night (1101) Bad night (4030) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.

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  (732): I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one. http://tfl.nu/pu4o
  Replies (12) Good night (460) Bad night (2758)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.

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  (412): girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid. http://tfl.nu/vm0r
  Replies (10) Good night (3436) Bad night (543) Order T-Shirt
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."

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  (918): at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes." http://tfl.nu/aef0
  Replies (11) Good night (561) Bad night (2908) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong

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  (630): So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong http://tfl.nu/7whz
  Replies (28) Good night (908) Bad night (5825) Order T-Shirt
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.

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  (865): Now go wash the fat girl off your hands. http://tfl.nu/sym9
  Replies (17) Good night (986) Bad night (4163) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.

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  (425): Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years. http://tfl.nu/f3i9
  Replies (8) Good night (589) Bad night (3389) Order T-Shirt
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.

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  (571): we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music. http://tfl.nu/kygq
  Replies (8) Good night (2562) Bad night (842) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!

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  (516): Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy! http://tfl.nu/mmzc
  Replies (6) Good night (2742) Bad night (793) Order T-Shirt
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  (707): View more from California

  She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.

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  (707): She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place. http://tfl.nu/aqji
  Replies (9) Good night (5350) Bad night (821) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.

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  (401): The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm. http://tfl.nu/9ejj
  Replies (15) Good night (2331) Bad night (436) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  He makes me want to shower. It must be love.

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  (406): He makes me want to shower. It must be love. http://tfl.nu/y7mq
  Replies (4) Good night (716) Bad night (892) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?

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  (978): What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ? http://tfl.nu/aya6
  Replies (11) Good night (1358) Bad night (690) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.

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  (818): Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree. http://tfl.nu/znv5
  Replies (2) Good night (305) Bad night (641) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.

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  (902): I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas. http://tfl.nu/cu8d
  Replies (4) Good night (1176) Bad night (673) Order T-Shirt

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