i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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