We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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