He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.