The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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