i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
