Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
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