ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
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