Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
