I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Buhtt sex?
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Shame - the story of my life.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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