last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
