Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i can't believe i had my finger in that
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
