They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
You've changed since you got that strap on
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