I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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